Pregnancy Loss

Everyone is curious, and that's okay. I was struggling to decide how and what to share while navigating my miscarriage. The last photo with my growing babe to the final photo while my baby rests in my womb, I cherish every photographed memory of my journey and every moment of pregnancy.

September of 2022, we decided to expand our family. We always wanted a little piece of each other to complete our blended family. Fast forward to October 2023, which felt like a miracle happened, though we didn't find out until much later! As months passed, ultrasounds and blood work (all the normal stuff) gave us nothing but confirmation and reassurance that everything was going well. The planning and the excitement progressed as days and weeks passed.

Fast forward to Valentines Day, 4 months pregnant, we decided to announce our pregnancy on social media, not knowing our precious babies heart had stopped a week ago. Skip ahead to our first midwife appointment only 6 days later. This day completely shattered our hearts. The rush and fear of the unknown, laying in that hospital just knowing but trying to be optimistic, to finally hearing the words "I'm so sorry, unfortunately I don't have good news for you" on the phone, it will forever crush me.

Though his heart had stopped approximately 2 weeks prior to delivery, my body didn't naturally release the pregnancy. February 22nd, 4 1/2 months pregnant, though the worst day of our lives, I delivered baby Ashton in the hospital after 8 hours of labour @ 10:30pm. Holding his tiny lifeless body, though devastating, was a precious moment we are so lucky to have had with him. Admiring the tiniest little nose, fingers, and toes. This journey has forever changed me.

I am grateful for every message, call, and gift sent our way. Though this is my worst nightmare, and I am completely broken, I am okay, and I will be okay. Though the way Ashton "lay" in our home is far from the way I'd ever dreamt of, I'm glad he is home, and it gives me a sense of peace. This pregnancy brought me so much, including a love I'd never imagined. 💙

To all of you struggling with fertility in any way, shape or form. I hear you and I see you. You're not alone.💙